UnaX.dk

Yep, today is my birth day. I got this email from my exgirlfriend, who's in Spain on some language trip. It was very nice to see that she remembered and took the time to actually write me. Made me feel happy

Damn I'm drunk! Hahahaha, the great part is, that no matter how drunk I get, I'm still able to do whatever I want, more or less. My grammar is as good as ever, the only thing that's strange is: Why do I have 3 K keys on the keyboard now? KKK :O Now I understand why my yearbook said Ku-Klux-Klaus. I can fly btw, I just flew all the way from my living room to the kitchen to open a bottle of wine, and BANG, out of nowhere, I ended up here! It's amazing, I FLEW!

Why do I get so couragious when I'm drunk? Meghan, you love Irish drunkard, I LOVE YOU, for being drunk all the time

The time is 05:13, that's ok I guess, but why the hell am I still up? I got absolutely no idea, to why I'm up now, but apparently I can't sleep. Been sitting infront of the computer all night, except for a break where I were watching “Office Space”, that's a funny movie! I'm so bored, I wish I had something to do. Like collecting herbs for some alchemist somewhere in Uganda. That might cheer me up, but I'm never sure.

Been staring at this post for quite some while. what should I write? Where should I go?
Answer is as always, I have no plans. not like I'm doing anything. This has becomn a bad habit, but hey, I'll still have my good spirit… Or something…

No, it's not a joke. I'm having visions. Not any of that “I can predict the future” visions, but disturbing, nasty and frighting visions. I have them mostly when I sleep, at least that's how it used to be. Now, it has all changed, I can have these horrifying visions while walking around the town, sitting in the bus, on the train, in other words everywhere. Normally I'm not a person who gets easily scared, but these things I see are really disturbing. It started with dreams, well nightmares, where my family got killed, I got killed, my friends got killed. Also that nasty dream, all of us have had at least one time, the one, where you wake up while falling down. But these are not the most disturbing visions I've had. I'll try to tell the worst one I've had, in fact that was just three nights ago:

It all starts nice and comfortable, me walking down the stairs of a metro station. (There is no such thing as a subway, it's a metro! Take note of the word, it's french, and what everybody should use. I also accept “the tube” and “the underground”, but NO subways!) When I get down the stairs and onto the platform where the metro train is supposed to come, everything's still normal. The metro stops up, our metros have no drivers, they're all controlled from some computer tower somewhere in Copenhagen, but this train has a driver. It might sound lame, but it's this all red guy, with long black hair and flames in his eyes. Not like flames out of the eyes, but flames, like instead of green or blue eyes. (Could look abit like the eye of Sauron in Lord of the Rings, and then again it couldn't, it's very hard to explain, but it's very scary.) For some reason I'm the only person on the platform, so there's no help to get there. I enter the metro and when I get inside, the floor dissapears and I'm standing on a tall spikey pole, almost so spikey that it goes through the soles of my shoes, but they just hold out, it's Airwalk afterall. The pole is surrounded by lava. These all red guy with the black hair comes out from the non-existant place where the driver is supposed to be. “You're time has come, you've been selected as unworthy of being part of this world anymore!” he says, with this scary voice. He shows me a picture of my family, my father, mother, big sister and little sister. All of them have been hung. “You're unworthyness has costed your family's life, now it's your turn!” he screams. “The most unworthy way for you to die is this!”. Swiftly he pulls something over my head and everything turns dark for a few seconds. Then the light reappears and I see that I'm now wearing a German national jersey, with Jürgen Klinsmann on the back. I scream, he laughs and pushes me down the pole, while yelling: “DIE! DIE! DIE! DIE! DIE!”. I woke up less than 3 centimeters from the lava all wet of sweat. I was so scared, I was near screaming, but held it back thinking, that it was just a dream. But I wasn't sure, I simply had to call my mother at 4 in the morning to find out. I'm a wreck…

I wonder, why did I have to wear a German national shirt, with Klinsmann on the back, whilst I died? Why is the most unworthy way for me to die?

As all this wasn't enough, I'm starting to see this red guy everywhere. I even saw him kill somebody in the bus I were in, last time I went to my parents house. All the time he looked at me, saying: “You're next, you're next!”. I wonder what'll happen with me.

This is mostly the reason why I've been away. I've been hiding, trying to hide from my own mind. But I'll tell you now, if your mind ever starts playing tricks like this with you, there's nowhere to run and nowhere to hide. Your mind follows you everywhere. Let me as an end to this update state: I DO NOT DO DRUGS! Not of any kind, these visions have just comn out of nowhere, out of nothing. I wish I knew why. I don't think I need help, but I've thought about going to a head doctor and get my head examined. Maybe even get something to calm down my nerves, because I'm falling apart…

Wenn das Leben gerade so einfach waren, da es zu sollte. Dann würden Sie nicht alle diese Probleme haben, aber anscheinend, bin ich der, wer beschlossen werden, um diese Probleme zu haben. Ich hasse die Welt. Die Welt haßt mich. Lassen Sie mich sein. Lassen Sie MICH ALLEIN!

It's true, I really are pathetic. I always stride to achive what's unachiveable. I always want what I can't get. Ha, when is it that I realise that I'm really just a pathetic nobody, placed on this earth to be laughed at. To be the one people say things to, knowing that I got noone to tell it to. The fact that I'm alone, always will be, ha, I'm pathetic.

“Run, run, while you can, leave it behind, never come back. Flee, to the eternal darkness!”

Just felt like telling you all that I'm still alive, so here it is: The confirmation, most of you wanted to hear, some of you might have wished it otherwise, I'M ALIVE, so far…

Monday the 13th of June. That's the big day, the day that'll show if my life is ruined or fantastic. But why do I have to take a language test, to prove that I can study in England? I find it offensive towards me, and also very racist from the English universities. Of course I can study there, no problem! Not like Englishmen have to take a test in Danish before they're allowed into our universities… Let us in with out this ridicilous test, remember we are you eternal friends. We are, like you, an American president arse licking country. Whatever you do, we do. People are even afraid that your language will be the first language here within the next 50 years. LET ME IN WITHOUT THE TEST. Not that I think I'll fail, but still.

Anyhow, I will pass the test, and damn my heard hurts…

Hmmm, the clock just passed 06:50, the sun is shining and the weather is projected to 30+ degrees today. I'm having a giant problem. After I've been in a state of insomnia, I've turned into the opposite. I fall asleep at 21:00 every day now, and wake up at around 04:00. It's quite annoying, especially considering that I'm going to a birthday party tonight. I might have to leave just as I arrive, since I'm so so tired when the clock turns 21:00. Hmmmm, maybe I should get a job, that might be able to fix my problem, but then again I doubt anyone will hire me, when I have to stop the 12th of August, to join the army. Luckily we got that denial work thingy instead of the army, where you can work it off, for a pay lower than minimum wage. But I'm willing to do that, to avoid getting trained to kill. I'm a pacifist, so me with a gun, would be like George W. Bush with a brain. Totally unrealistic and dangerous.

What are the prospects for the day? Other than me watching “Return to River Cottage” (of course) at 09:55, I have to go buy a present to Camilla. But what do you buy for a girl who turns 21? I mean, I could go splash my £10 on some cheap perfume or something, but I feel that's something a boyfriend does, and not me who's just a close friend. Will meet up with my friend Frederik to buy the present, and so far our ideas are as follows:
1) Go to the toystore and get her a Pokémon or something.
2) A gift-certificate for a night out with us, where we pay the fare to Copenhagen (hehe, that would be great for us ).
3) A lifetime friendship card, to prove that she's friends of us. (Wouldn't you like that?)
4) A bottle of cheap Russian vodka.
5) A very ugly teddybear.
6) A dance with me!

That's about what we've figured out so far, but I don't think that these gifts are very good. What to get, what to get? Well we'll probably find out sometime today. I really want to go to the beach, but I think that the water will be way to cold. Here in Farum (yep at my parents house, again ) Denmarks deepest lake is situated. The water is all green, but theres a beach and we always went there as kids. Maybe I should go there again, but I'm not sure.

Why is there nothing on tele this early in the morning? I'm watching some cartoon, which is absolutely shite. I wish I had something to do, but I think I just have to stay bored for the rest of the morning. Wont someone come online to entertain me? The cartoon is called “Ubos, the magic book”, sounds great, eh? IT'S NOT!

What a day I've had. Got up early and got a shower, went for the bus. Got to Husum station and took the train, then the bus from Ballerup to Farum. Walked all the long way to my parents house. Woke up my mother, went downstairs to watch my beloved “Return to River Cottage”. Put my mother in her wheelchair and pushed her of to the bus. You see, my mother is a very bad walker, with the arthritis and all, so it's pretty bad that she had to walk up a gazillion stairs at a station, due to the lift being out of order. She'll probably die of pain tomorrow. Anyhow, we were going to watch an exebithion from my grandmothers school. My grandmother is blind and is doing some crafting. So we went to her school to watch it, it was really great. Fantastic that blind people can create something that are so pretty. Went to their cafeteria and ate a mackerel sandwich I LOVE MACKEREL, nearly as much as I love beer. That should say it all! Got my mother all the way home and went to sit infront of the computer. Been sitting here for 7 hours now, only stopped once, to make myself 3 french hotdogs, which I've just consumed. Will now leave the computer and go read a book.

GOD DAMN I'M BORED!